Friday, September 17, 2004

Talking for my own comfort.

My heart is beating fast. My loyalties are torn. I do not know which one to turn to. I tell one, and I hurt the other. I give this thing to one, even if the other doesn't know, I hurt them. I know who I will choose. I know I will face the wrath of the other. Why cannot they work together? Why must we be perpetually set up in two camps: his and hers. I will tell him. I will give it to him. And she will rage because of it. Maybe neither one of them would be good, but I cannot keep it for myself, it is not mine, as much as I would like to have it. Mine is coming soon enough, and thank you to those that gave it to me. So I wait. I wait for them to get home. If I tell him in secret, she will not anger for awhile. If I tell him in front of her, they will fight all weekend. Must tell him when she is not around. Must be secret. I hate this. I really hate this. But I am glad that it fell into my hands instead of in hers, who knows what she might have done with it? But what is strange, is that it usually would have gone straight to her. Why did it come this way, the way that I could have intercepted? And I mightn't have done it, but something told me to. Something did. Eh, I wait. So, I will sit here and wait for them. The time seems long. So, so long.

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