Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Chris is watching me type and it makes me nervous.

Okay kids, its been a LONG while, but there is not much to say. I'm not doing anything interesting besides mooning over boy (no "s" necessary), working, and reading strange novels about vampires, dragons, and what-have-you. Lets see. . . Nope, nothing interesting. Unless you want to hear about all the wonderful things a certain handsome young man said today. . .

I didn't think so.

Sarah Jo

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

"Whats right for me might be not right for you."

I spent the day with Emilie today. She asked me how old I was. I told her.
She said, "Then you will be twenty and you will have to fall in love."
Kids. . .

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

I finished Eldest. Now I have to wait till the next one comes out. But I did discover that there will be an Eragon movie in December.

Thats all I have to say about that. . .

Sarah Jo

Monday, May 15, 2006

Finding your inner-nerd:

I haven't felt myself since classes ended. I got so used to being busy all the time, I do not know what to do with myself now that I have all this free time. I've been doing a lot of reading, because I can never do enough of that during the semester. I read Eragon and now I'm reading Eldest. I really enjoy them. Elves, drwarves, dragons, magic, what else could one ask for?

I really like being at work more, because I genuinely like everyone I work for, but its been kind of emotionally draining for the last couple of weeks and the pleasure of it has been absent. I wish things would return to normal, I guess time will tell with that one.

I've been seeing a lot less of people in general and that makes me sad because I've got a lot more time to see people now.

Saturday I spent the day with my three favorite girls and it was a blast. I just love crawling around on the floor and playing pretend or whatever else they come up with. Kaitlynn was content looking at pictures and exclaiming over each one with phrases such as, "Tha' me and SISSY!" or "LOOK, you!". I love that child. She is talking so well lately. And she is such a polite little thing. Emilie wanted to practice "dance moves" in which I picked her up in various different ways, one including her jumping into my arms. Whew. Elisabeth just wanted me to let her cry, and then treat her special and pamper her. I did. It was so nice. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Now I don't have anything to look forward to except school in June. Exciting, I know. There's an RK concert in July and I'm going to Indianapolis with Joanie, Ashley, and the girls, but those are both too far away to get excited about, especially since the summer school lies between here and there.

I still haven't gotten my financial aid package for next semester. Its like this nagging worry in the back of my mind all the time. Am I going to be able to pay for this one more year? Again, time will tell. Stupid patience.

I guess I'm running out of things to say but I haven't said nearly enough for me. I need a good talk. Yes. I haven't had one for. . . I don't know. One of those talks where you feel excited afterward because you know that you both know each other better now. One of those.

My room is a mess again. Now that's something I can do with my free time.
And. . . I was really into Gavin DeGraw there for a bit but I think its passing. I do, however, have his voice playing in my head constantly. But that's okay, its gorgeous. "I'm gonna love you more than anyone. . ." Yum.

I went out to dinner with my mom today and I saw a friend I haven't seen since LAST spring. We spent so much time together and then the semester ended and so did we. But, I'm going to try to fix it, because. . . That's what needs to be done. I've never been the person to initiate friendships or even outings or anything, and I've discovered that I have to step up and start things because sometimes no one else will. And right now, I'm only doing that in one small part of my life, and I'm waiting to see how it turns out before I try it in other areas. I'm getting success about half the time and disaster the other half. I don't think I'll ever figure people out. Its amazing how easy it is to hurt other people accidentally. I'm trying so hard and I keep messing up in ways I never anticipated and then I'm afraid to try again but I'm even more afraid of never trying again. Alright, you have no idea what I'm talking about and I'm not going to say it so I'll just move and think over it for awhile.

What on earth should I move on to? I don't know either and its getting late and I've now spent half an hour away from my precious book right at the climax, no less. The country is on the brink of war, several key characters are in dramatic situations that could lead to success or disaster, and an exciting new prospect has just revealed itself. What shall become of Roran, the villagers, Nusuada, Saphira, and Eragon? Will Galbatorix be successful in his attempt to wipe out the Varden for good, or will they succeed in overthrowing the century-old tyrant? What will Eragon do with his newfound abilities? Will the "black hand" be successful in their assassination attempts, or will the girl-child Elva save Nusuada once again? Are Murtagh and the Twins really dead? Will the dragons face the distinction that would wreak havoc on all three races? Will the drwarves arrive in time to aid Surda in the upcoming battle against Galbatorix? Will Eragon? Is Oromis going to die, and what causes his illness? Will the secret to Galbatorix's increasing power finally be revealed? So you see why I am so engrossed.
I realized, though, that most of these questions will remain unanswered until the release of the third book. Stupid patience.


Sarah Jo

Thursday, May 04, 2006

I've listened to this song eight times in a row now.

I guess I'm going to Michigan for the weekend. And I'm driving. ALL BY MYSELF. We shall see how that one turns out. I'm nervous. But I need to be more adventurous and I wont know if I can do it if I never try. I just hate driving and I hate being alone and those two things come together nicely on this trip. Unfortunately, theres no one I can drag with me this time. I'm staying two nights. Robbie took me last time, but that was a day trip. Be brave, Sarah Jo. You can do it. If I get terribly lost will someone come to my rescue?

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

This is what not studying looks like:

I wish that, for one semester, I could take only classes I want to take, that have absolutely nothing to do with my major. Such as: creative writing, ceramics, Italian, Spanish, anthropology, photography, philosophy, popular literature. . . So many classes, so little time (but mostly money).

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

I'm in a wicked grumpy mood because I'm tired but I cant sleep because I have to study for my finals but I don't want to study because I feel lonely and I want to talk to someone but I can't because I have to study. . .

Monday, May 01, 2006


I'm feeling a little bit lonely because
we talked and didn't say anything important
and we don't have any new memories at all
and our inside jokes have all gotten stale
and we let time and distance do
what we promised no time or distance could ever do
and all I want to do is hug you again
but you are too far away for that
and hugging you feels like hugging a stranger
because we let time and distance do
what we promised no time or distance could ever do
and I will never be again
what I always was with you
and I miss that because I thought it was beautiful
and I always thought you were beautiful
even when I didn't like you so much
but I don't know who you are anymore because
we let time and distance do
what we promised no time or distance could ever do
and I just want to hold you again
to make sure you are still real
to make sure those eyes are the same eyes I looked into
six years ago
before we let time and distance do. . .

but I will always, always, always love you
I promise you that.

Sarah Jo

"You know what I mean?"

I finished my Exceptional Learners exam and now I'm waiting for my Computer exam. I've got about an hour to waste so. . .
I'll try to come up with something worth reading.

I dyed my hair! Its, uh, redder. And it washes out because I'm not brave enough for the whole permanent hair color thing. If it is, in fact, a thing.

Oh, and I purchased the Gavid DeGraw cd and I think he is much awesome. My favorite song is Follow Through. "So, if you want to be with me, you have to follow through with every word you say." Beautiful.

I have this stack of books to read and they are taunting me because I haven't had time to read them. If they had fingers, they would point them and laugh.

I had a great weekend. Did you? I just realized that this time would be better spent preparing for one of the three exams I still have left. Nah.

I'm not really going for any coherent sequence of thoughts just now.

So, I keep watching movies that involve Tom Cruise and I keep not meaning to do so. I had this list of movies everyone but me has seen and blockbuster online just ships them to me in whatever order they want to. So I've recently watched Top Gun, Risky Business, Legend, War of the Worlds, and I'll be recieving Jerry Maguire next.

Oh, I bought this pretty notebook; the pages have pink lines and hearts. Its a very happy notebook. So, it shall be my journal (because I don't like the word "diary".) What is the correct punctuation for the previous sentance, anyway? Where does the period go? Anyway, getting back on subject, keeping a "journal" seems so middle-school but there is something satisfying about filling the (pretty) pages with ink and saying things without worrying about what other people with think, or whether or not they even want to hear it.

I think I can go to class now.

L.A.O.I.S (speaking of middle-school)

Sarah Jo