Four minutes. And my brain is working so poorly that I couldn't spell minutes the second time although I spelled it the first time and it was right in front of my face. I kind of want to be around people right now. But only certain people. On the other hand, its one of those moods where I could spend the whole day alone just stewing. I don't want to stew.
Three minutes. And I keep thinking about all these things I should be doing but I keep doing what I want to do instead. I've done what I have to do for far too long. I'm ready to be irresponsible and impulsive and happy.
Two minutes. I've survived far more than I think you could ever know. I know the scars aren't visible on the surface but it makes me worry that if I ever let anyone close enough to see them, they'll run away. I know how to be healthy and happy as just me, but I don't know how to fix the damage already done. What do I do?
No minutes. And I keep typing anyway because I don't want to go to work. I don't want to crawl back into that bed of unhappiness either. I think I would like to rewind and do things over again. Maybe things that matter to me don't matter to anyone else so much. I don't know. But I'm a sensitive creature even though I don't show it and I'm feeling sad. Dang it.
Minus one. I'll be nearly late for work if I don't leave now. I don't want to leave. I don't want to stay here. And the people I want to see are all sleeping.