Sunday, January 03, 2010
Read two books. Watched a scary movie by myself. Worried and worried. Baked cookies. Spent four hours at the gym. Talked on the phone for hours. Texted my girlfriends like crazy. Spent nearly three whole days completely alone. Made breakfast, lunch, and dinner at home from organic, fresh ingredients. Didn't cry. Not even once. Sang out loud in my bedroom till my throat hurt. Investigated the Clifbar website. Felt confused and hurt and concerned. Shopped for things I didn't need. Took the long way home just to avoid being home any longer. Went to sleep early just so I wouldn't have to experience anymore awake time. Tried to examine exactly what happened when I drank too much New Year's Eve to make sure I remembered it all correctly. Looked up recipes for things I'll probably never make. Brushed my teeth excessively and tried new ways to put on my make-up and fix my hair and picked at my face and examined myself in the mirror from several angles. Tried unsuccessfully to watch streaming movies on Netflix. Cleaned my laundry and my room. Stared into space just remember how nice it felt. Been woken up from dreams that were so nice it made my heart hurt to realize they weren't true yet. Maybe never. Waited and waited.
From the mind of Sarah Jo at 9:10 PM